Actions where even Adidas’ tagline may be left stumped

With age comes wisdom- I don’t know who said that but that person clearly hasn’t met my grandfather. There are a bunch of simple things that no matter how old I become I’ll probably never ever master but I’m not mature enough to accept it yet. So let’s just say this is the list of things that I have YET to perfect. These are few actions that I, as a human being, am incapable of doing.

  • Utter the word ‘no’

I cannot even TYPE THAT WORD without flinching. Needless to say, this seemingly ‘polite-kind’ attribute of mine has made my head bang spot on with trouble innumerable times.

  • Trying to make someone laugh when they don’t want to

This again seems pretty harmless, but noooo.

X: We have to define what..ever we have

Me: huh?

X: The relationship we have..I’m not sure it’s just friendship you know

Me: I don’t think I’m ready to be a mother to a 21 year old boy.

X: :$

Incase you were wondering, he didn’t laugh.

  •  Let it go

I can bring up something you did 10 years back unintentionally which hurt me to a fight we have today and I can barely remember what I had for lunch. Our brains work in mysterious ways.

  • Dance in public

This is actually a good thing. Recently my parents fitted a full mirror in their washroom and I got a glance of all those ‘sexy moves’ I have been doing. NOT PRETTY.

  • Eat a subway sandwich-without it seemingly like a mini explosion occurred all over my face.
  • Not ruin a favourite song.

If I like a song, it is guaranteed that I will listen to it over and over and over again and drive everyone including myself insane. In the end, I’ll hate that song and will stay as far as one can stay away from a song till it surprisingly pops up in my headphone and reminds me about the special relationship we shared. And then it continues..

Or I make my favourite song my alarm when I have to wake up at ungodly hours to complete work I should have completed decades ago. That is also another method with profound results to ruin your favourite song.

  • Follow the script

Predict conversations in my head and in reality while the other person follows my script which he/she has never read, I end up fumbling and messing up my lines. I wrote the script, must have practiced it into the night but when the moment comes I don’t remember a thing.

  • Not talk to inanimate objects

It’s very creepy as I have been told a couple of times by loved ones. There was a phase where I held my phone personally responsible for all the bad news I had been hearing that day. Don’t ask. I still think there is nothing wrong about blessing the fan on an extremely hot day or to yell insults with alternative encouraging words to your personal gadgets when they aren’t doing what they are supposed to be doing.

  • Be normal

Everyone’s definition of normal is a tad different and it is slightly over-rated. Imagine a world in which you had no weird quirks. You would be perfect and also extremely boring. That’s what I tell myself along with a pat on my back when these little things try to create ruckus in that big game of life.

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2 thoughts on “Actions where even Adidas’ tagline may be left stumped

  1. I wish I could explain in words how relatable this post was. I was literally (okay, not literally, I’m just exaggerating) checking things off in my head because I do EVERY SINGLE THING that you mentioned.

    Liked by 1 person

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